


Swish, Swish

by gurajiorasu



Series: Arashi Living Together [3]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-02
Updated: 2015-02-02
Packaged: 2018-03-10 05:09:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3277922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gurajiorasu/pseuds/gurajiorasu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Naked or Sailor Mars, your choice,” Ohno grinned</p>
            </blockquote>





	Swish, Swish

Sho stopped the water and sighed contently. His day was long and tiring, he felt like he hadn’t even breathed from the morning. Fortunately, the shower in Jimusho was rather empty that day, so he jumped right in without even thinking. It felt odd because it was extremely quiet without his band-mates who love to jump into one’s shower unceremoniously, but it gave him peace so he thought it’s alright.

He smoothed his dripping wet hair backwards with his hand and took his towel to dry himself. He hummed random songs while doing so, already imagining dinner that would greet him once he got home. Was it Jun’s turn to cook? Or Nino? He didn’t remember but it was definitely not his turn that night.

Sho was eager to go home now that he’s already refreshed. He only needed to put his clothes on then he could start his short journey home. But, when he reached for his clothes, nothing was there.

“What the-,” Sho wrapped his lower part of body with towel and walked out the shower. The place was quiet and empty. His bag was there but that was it. No shirts, no pants, no underwear. All gone.

“Oh, fuck,” Sho cursed. It must be someone he knew putting pranks on him. Geez, his car was so near but he couldn’t walk there naked, could he?

Sho scrambled through his bag and called home as his last resort. He just hoped there’s someone else besides Nino at home because, _damn_ , Nino wouldn’t want to move his ass just to bring Sho some clothes.

After several dialing tones, someone picked up, “Hello?”

It was Ohno.

“Satoshi, it’s me, Sho,” Sho said because Ohno’s voice was sleepy and unsure, “Can somebody, _please_ , bring me some clothes to Jimusho? My clothes are stolen.”

“Stolen?” Ohno asked.

“Yes. When I was showering. Now I’m naked and don’t know what to do,” Sho was exasperated, “Is there someone else home?”

“MatsuJun’s cooking.”

“Masaki?”

“Dunno.”

“Ah, crap,” Sho massaged his temple, “Can you persuade Nino to bring it to me? Please, this towel is _tiny_ and I’m freezing!”

“Nino is not home,” Ohno answered. He was still as sleepy as ever.

Sho grunted. How he hoped Ohno had a driving license.

“I can take a cab, though. But I don’t know which clothes to bring,” finally, a ray of hope.

“Anything’s fine,” Sho answered quickly, “Just open my closet and take anything decent to cover my body. I’m going straight home, anyway.”

There’s a short pause. Then,

“Okay.”

Sho smiled wide, “Thank you, Satoshi. I’ll be waiting!”

The connection was terminated and Sho spent his time waiting by cursing to anyone who stole his outfits.

*******

“This- what- WHY?!” Sho nearly screamed when he revealed the clothes that Ohno brought from home.

Ohno shrugged while restraining his laugh, “You did say _anything_.”

“But not this!” Sho threw the Sailor Mars costume back to the paper bag.

“It was the first thing on your closet! It’s not my fault that you keep those. I was in hurry, you know,” Ohno gave his defense in between his chuckle, “Besides, red suits you.”

“How can I go out with these, huh?!”

“It can easily pass as a high school uniform, don’t you think?”

“Then my face would be on the headlines tomorrow,” Sho pulled his hair out of frustration.

“It’s late and your car is just outside. It won’t be a matter,” Ohno outright laughed.

“Some juniors are still outside! My dignity, Ohno san, dignity!”

Ohno threw another paper bag to Sho, “Don’t worry, I’ve prepared the wig and a mask. And high heels.”

Sho’s eyes widened. He grabbed the wig - the _right_ wig, even - and waved it in front of Ohno, “You! You planned this! You do this _deliberately_ , you old jerk!”

“I’m sorry, I just can’t resist,” Ohno laughed harder.

“And here I thought you’re the victim of the sick costume play at home,” Sho was fuming.

Ohno shrugged again, “Wanna flip the situation a bit, I guess.”

“Do it to Aiba or MatsuJun, then! I didn’t do anything!”

“I can see myself and Nino in bunny onesies on your phone’s screen, Sho kun.”

Yeap. Sho couldn’t say anything about that.

“Naked or Sailor Mars, your choice,” Ohno grinned, “Either way is fine with me.”

Sho stared at the red frilly skirt with a horrid face. He started to repent his decision to bring the costume back home. Why did he take the trouble to make it his on the first place? Oh yeah, because he looked _good_ in it.

Yeah.

Sho’s pout might be record breaking by then, but he took the sailor shirt and put it through his head while groaning, “I _hate_ you, Ohno san.”

Ohno laughed triumphantly as he walked his way out, “You’re welcome. I’ll be waiting outside. Be cute!”

*******

Ohno whistled as hard as he can when Sho came out. He wore everything; sailor shirt, frilly skirt, wig, high heels, and - unfortunately - the mask. The long straight hair suited him, actually.

“I’m going to kill you if we bump into someone,” Sho threatened. His eyes went here and there, making sure the hallway was clear from anyone.

“Cute chicks don’t murder,” Ohno teased.

“Shut up!” Sho whispered his scream and dragged Ohno away.

They walked hurriedly. Ohno was amazed how Sho managed to walk that fast on a stiletto like that. It was as if he was born to wear stiletto.

Ohno was not exaggerating, really. That’s how unbelievably natural Sho on high-heels was.

The parking lot was already in view and Sho was so near to running to his car when they heard a familiar voice called out.

“Ohno senpai?”

Shit. It’s Chinen.

Chinen Yuri, of all people. _Of course_ , he would stop his _favorite_ senpai. Of course.

“Ah, Chinen kun,” Ohno smiled.

Internally, Sho cursed like a witch. Ohno smiled. He _smiled_! Like they were just walking leisurely and Sho was not wearing ridiculous frilly _red_ skirt. Geez, what’s on his mind, really?!

Sho ducked his head down really low when Chinen approached them. It was decided that Ohno would do all his chores for a month right there and then.

“Uhm..,” Sho could feel Chinen’s gaze scanning through him from head to toe.

Did he notice? Did he?!

“Acquaintance, Ohno senpai?” Chinen asked.

Thanks to all holiness, Chinen didn’t notice that it was Sho.

“Ah- hmm..,” Ohno was trying hard to not laugh. That bastard.

“Hm?” Chinen leaned in curiously. Maybe the overly manly scent confused his mind.

Sho thought it was over. He already imagined how Chinen would tell his band-mates (it’s already 9, then!), then NEWS would hear it, then Kanjani8, then- well, after Kanjani8, let’s say the whole agency would hear about it. There went Sho’s dignity. All flew through the window. Bye bye, dignity.

But, Sho felt a hand gripped his firmly and brought the joined hands up so Chinen could see it.

“Girlfriend,” Ohno simply answered with a cheeky grin.

Chinen’s eyes gleamed. Heck, Ohno might say he loves a pile of dung and Chinen would still give the same reaction.

“I’ve never heard about- OH! Wow, Senpai, you sure know how to hide it well,” Chinen chirped.

Ohno just kept grinning.

Sho felt like burning. Even though his identity was still safe, he felt humiliated like crazy. He wanted to dig a hole and disappear. Maybe he should have picked naked than this costume. Maybe.

“Well then, be careful, Senpai. Nice to meet you, Ohno senpai’s girlfriend. I need to get going so-”

“Yeah, yeah, go on,” Ohno practically shooed Chinen away.

Chinen grinned and left. He ran. Damn, what did he eat to be so energetic like that?

Sho tugged Ohno’s hand and stomped his way out. Their hands were still linked but Sho found it easier to drag Ohno. From afar, they looked like a couple. Sadist girlfriend and insane boyfriend kind of couple.

Ohno, with all the guts that he had, laughed like he just watched a good gag right in front of his eyes. He earned a couple of slaps across his head for that and a not-so-gentle shove inside Sho’s car.

Sho started the engine and stepped on the pedal without much care. He’s a racer that night; fueled by embarrassment and slight anger.

Yeah, slight.

“Chores for a month- no, _a year_ , Ohno san!” Sho said, throwing his wig and mask to his backseat.

“Hey, it’s a one month material, not a year! Aiba and MatsuJun got none!” Ohno complained. He was still laughing, though.

“Your fault to play along,” Sho huffed. But then he remembered how he _enjoyed_ the game too- when it was played to Ohno and Nino, that is. So, he then said, “Well, fine, a month!”

Ohno grinned and reached to turn on the air conditioner but Sho slapped him.

“No aircon, old man!”

“It’s hot!”

“You _didn’t_ bring me any _underwear_ and you brought me _skirt_ instead. A short one, no less. Deduct yourself!”

“Eh?” Ohno’s eyes were sparkly even in the dark, “So- down there- _swish, swish_?” Ohno mimicked a swaying gesture with his hands.

“You bet,” Sho spitted out.

“Oh boy, I can’t wait until the whole house see this!” Ohno jumped on his seat.

“Not a chance, Ohno Satoshi, not. A. Chance,” Sho smirked. Victory was written across his wide forehead, “I’ll change my clothes before entering the house. I have some clothes on my trunk. I’m so _not_ going to end up on everyone’s wallpaper like you and Nino.”

Ohno sported a pout on his face.

There was _no_ commotion _at all_ when Sho walked inside the house that night.

*******

_Bzzt!_

A message went in just before Sho slipped inside his comfy blanket.

_Bzzt! Bzzt!_

Well, it must be notifications for chat, then.

_Bzzt! Bzzt! Bzzt! Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt!_

Okay, _that_ was never a good sign. Only Arashi could make one’s cellphone vibrate like a sex toy. But, they were all home, why did they use chat? Geez.

Sho opened his cellphone and his eyes almost popped out at once.

Ohno was sharing photos. _Sho’s_ photos. In Sailor Mars costume. With the _right_ wig. Sixteen photos and counting.

_What?!_

Sho typed furiously.

_Sakurai : What?! How?!_  
 _Ohno : New wallpaper guys. We have enough so don’t fight over it, okay?_  
 _Aiba : I’M TAKING THE DERP FACED ONE!_  
 _Nino : Gonna use the leg part only~_  
 _Sakurai : OY!_  
 _Jun : Don’t disturb me, I’m making a collage._  
 _Sakurai : OY! HOW DID YOU TAKE THOSE, OHNO SATOSHI?!_  
 _Ohno : Tech geek and experiment freak are in the house._  
 _Nino : Tech geek *points at myself*_  
 _Aiba : Experiment freak *raises hands*_  
 _Sakurai : You are so dead_  
 _Ohno : Don’t you want to see my new wallpaper?_

Ohno sent an image.

Sho felt like fainting.

It was another photo of Sho. Taken from _under_ the skirt.

“OHNO SATOSHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!” Sho’s scream broke the night’s silence. He opened his door with a loud bang.

Too bad four clicks of doors being locked happened before some serious strangling and choking could be commenced.

Well, at least they had another set of new wallpapers.


End file.
